Horoscopes

Horoscopes were a running collum written by Mobster ie for the earliest MCO news outlet, the Voice of Freedonia. While issue 1 appears to be lost to time, the surviving issues feature dedicated horoscopes.

Halipleunom (The Wanderer)

As you travel, you discover and in discovery you find enlightenment. Your travels bring many rewards of course, but the problem is you're being stalked by some irritating pvp'er who keeps killing you and stealing your stuff. CURSE HIS EYES!!!
As you walk freely over the earth you can fill your pockets with apples, or find a few free roaming cows or pigs. but most likely you'll end up with loads of rotten flesh and have an iffy tummy. A warning to other players: give halipleunom a WIDE berth this week...

Commercari (The Trader)

Deals are always difficult - Should you sell at bargain basement prices or rip-off ignorant players? Only you can decide the answer. Just remember: the universe forgives you but pissed players usually don't, so expect Karma to get you with a nice fire aspect sword in the back!
Good fortune smiles upon you this day, and if it doesn't you can always undercut your trading partners. You'll never go hungry. Millions others might, but hey that's buisness!

Inflectum (The Fighter)

Adventure is afoot! But are you up to the challenge? You may feel confident in your abilities but are you SURE? I mean that might look like a nice innnocent noobie but how do you know you won't be running away screaming and on fire? I mean we all appreciate the entertainment value of such images but is it worth it?
Fighters are no good if they're starved. so rape and pillage your way to the fighter physique that's necessary in this competitive world. Because tonight you dine in HELL!!!

Minerae (The Miner)

Things may seem dark for you today, and you may even feel lost and uncertainity abounds. Should you go in this direction? or perhaps this way is better, we all find ourself asking these questions in life. Just don't go THAT way!?! oh no too late...........
Being a miner can be a lonely profession. But you're used to that bit of bread alone in your cave. Your meals might be lonely affairs but remember miner: you are rich in spirit! *cries a little clutching his pick axe in a tender way.....*

Ingeniarii (The Engineer)

I'm afraid to say ingeniarii, the next few days do not look good for you, you will have to keep a level head, the technical is always difficult. Luck may not be on your side but experience is! Just keep a level head and try not to mess up too many servers!
Ingenarii you don't ever worry about thirst or hunger. It's a case of "when i'm hungry, well I can build that stupidly large burger machine and laugh maniacally as cows have a wonderful mere 10 seconds of life and then scream to their deaths."

Extruo (The Builder)

Extruo you are the most productive sign, you also are sociable as you offer your services to help build great things. But did you really have to help build the stupidly large Pink Castle?

Repto (The Sneaker)

Sneak around a bit and wait for someone to open those chests, then just nick those stacks of steak and eat like a king! Just don't grow fat and lazy off your spoils.