Elbonia
 People's Democratic Republic of Elbonia
| |
 Note: more recent city changes will not be listed on the wiki (possibly, look on /map). | |
| About | |
|---|---|
| Founder |  Tekupuristo
|
| Contributors |  Lukemaster60
|
| Category | Towns |
| Public access? | Yes |
| Public build? | no |
| Size north to south | 40m |
| Size west to east | 40m |
| Transport | |
| Nexus link? | No |
| Portal? | no |
| Location | |
| Coordinates | X=14885 Y=70 Z=7700 |
| Dimension | Overworld |
| Map Link | |
GLORY TO THE WORKERS’ PROLETARIAT! LONG LIVE THE PEOPLE'S DEMOCRATIC REPUBLIC OF ELBONIA!
Elbonia is a Nation created by Tekupuristo and Lukemaster60. The city provides a lot by law—yet nothing in practice. It’s filled with corruption an—
THERE IS NO CORRUPTION IN ELBONIA. ALL CITIZENS ARE EQUAL! REMEMBER OUR CREED:
- HAPPINESS IS MANDATORY!
- INDEPENDENT BUILD PROJECTS ARE A CAPITALIST THREAT!
- ELBONIA – BLOCK BY BLOCK, TOGETHER FOREVER!
“People's Democratic Republic of Elbonia” may also be referred to simply as “Elbonia,” and may reference both the town and the Nation itself.
Glorious National Anthem
Let the spirit of Elbonia swell within your ears, comrades!
GLORIOUS ORIGINAL ANTHEM OF ELBONIA!
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How To Travel To The Glorious Nation
Public Alias: `/tpto Snowdonia`
Nexus – Orange Nexus waypoint 3 → World Border
Additional directions: Just travel to Snowdonia, then go East. Follow the second path to the left of the Nexus waypoint area, then turn left. Alternatively, access a nearby Nether portal and use the Nether highway system to travel to Elbonia.
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About the Nation
FIRST GLORIOUS BUILDING IN OUR FIVE-YEAR PLAN! DUE TO CAPITALIST SABOTAGE, DOORS ARE YET TO BE PRODUCED. LONG LIVE ELBONIA!
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IN ELBONIA WE BELIEVE IN A RULE OF EQUALS
To balance things out, all citizens are equally repressed... err, represented. Every citizen is equally expected to follow quotas, obey building codes, and smile while doing it. Remember:
- **Failure to be happy is sabotage.**
- **Failure to meet quota is treason.**
- **Failure to comply is independent thought, and that is dangerous.**
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EQUALS OF ELBONIA
| Rank | Assigned User | Role Description |
|---|---|---|
| General Party Secretary | Tekupuristo
|
Supreme leader and final authority on all matters. All quotas, builds, and ideas must pass through their gloriously inefficient approval process. |
| Commissar of Cobblestone Quotas | Lukemaster60
|
Oversees production of cobblestone, ensuring arbitrary quotas are exceeded in reports but never met in practice. |
| Minister of Agricultural Inefficiency | (Vacant) | Implements poorly thought-out farming layouts and enforces uniform crop spacing for the glory of the state. |
| Minister Potato Hypothermial Reeducation |  Freeman77
|
Teaches potatoes to endure the cold for the glorious socialist state!. |
| State Treasurer and Chief Paper minter of the Elbonian Dirtmark |  Jesev
|
Constructs needlessly complex redstone contraptions to perform simple functions. Every button press must activate 10 pistons. |
| Redstone Bureaucrat |  Ghostis
|
Constructs needlessly complex redstone contraptions to perform simple functions. Every button press must activate 10 pistons. |
| Director of Sheep Collectivization | (Vacant) | Collects all sheep for the state. Private wool ownership is treason. |
| Chief of Anti-Capitalist Security (CACS) | (Vacant) | Monitors for illegal trading, capitalist propaganda, and free thought. Rewards loyalty with surveillance exemptions. |
| People's Cultural Censor | (Vacant) | Destroys bourgeois architectural elements, neon signs, and any unauthorized banners. Promotes utilitarian cobble aesthetics. |
| Commissar of Railway Gloriousness | (Vacant) | Designs railways that are oversized, underused, and excessively straight. Detours and curves are capitalist luxuries. |
| Junior Block Inspector |  AdoreKitten
|
Entry-level rank. Responsible for counting blocks and submitting reports no one reads. Dreams of one day placing a sign. |
Glorious Elbonian Economy
The economy of Elbonia is proudly inefficient, based on resource quotas and state-controlled Dirtmark, our proud and completely non-functional currency.
- Dirtmark
- The official currency of Elbonia. Can be exchanged at the State Dirt Bank for nothing in particular. Worthless, but patriotically mandatory.
- Quotas
- Citizens must meet mandatory production targets, often unrelated to real demand. Failure to meet quotas results in re-education or additional block-counting duties.
- Black Market Suppression
- Unauthorized trading is strictly forbidden. All commerce must pass through the Central Trading Committee, which is often offline.
- Mandatory Labor Celebrations
- Citizens gather weekly to praise the dirt pile and celebrate our successful 0.2% increase in gravel production.
Brief Nation Stuff
Elbonia town originated after Tekupuristo was whining about something he doesn't remember and lukemaster60 informed him he could build right next to Snowdonia, by sheer luck it rhymed with the nation Tekupruristo had in mind for the are (sorry, it wasn't intentional that would imply clever creativity) and he constructed his first GLORIOUS BUILDING WITHOUT DECADENT CAPITALIST NONSENSE
From this Tekupuristo have yet to expand much. lukemaster60 got the idea at least for building a canal.
Enemies of the State: Official Watchlist of Shame
The following individuals, towns, or behaviors are hereby declared **Enemies of the People's Democratic Republic of Elbonia**, subject to public denunciation, cobble-shoveling duty, or ceremonial exile (via minecart).
All entries are added via unanimous decision by the Central Anti-Capitalist Oversight Bureau (CACOB) and rubber-stamped by the General Party Secretary.
| Offender | Crime Against the Glorious State | Recommended Re-Education Measures |
|---|---|---|
| None | Glorious harmony currently prevails among the people! | Long may it last. |
Note: All citizens are encouraged to report suspected individualism, quota-failureism, or suspiciously modern architecture to your nearest Junior Block Inspector.